here we gooooooooooo
The Bachelorette, Season Premier
Anonymous asked: why hath thou forsaken me
i’ll explain it in person when i see you again
Anonymous asked: Thank you for make me laugh out loud so many times over the last two days of reading every. single. post. Please, sir, may i have some more?!
Anonymous asked: did you die
No, but I was hiding in the ~South of France~ where u can’t watch Hulu. as LE FRONCH say, “EET EEZ NOT POSSEE-BULL”.
I am back in LA now.
"This first date with Juan-Pablo is going AH-mazing. We are having AH-blast. Check! He’s HUH-larious. Check! I feel like a kid again! I haven’t felt this alive because of a man in a long, long, long, LONG time."
- Contestant Clare who should calm down about feeling like a kid again considering his inconsistent history of paying child support. But what do I know? I have never been filmed for television alone in a fabricated wonderland of out of season snow with a stranger before, so MAYBE I should just stop talking now!
El Báchélór, Episode Two
"I’ve been through a lot. Like, a lot.* And I’m sick and tired of people looking at me and feeling sorry for me.**
- Contestant Lauren H, who has been through a lot and doesn’t need your pity THANKS
El Báchélór, Season Premier
*A lot? Like, how much is a lot? A LOT like the amount of times tonight that you have told us you have been through a lot?
**Girl, why’d you come on this show, then? lol